I was learning to make a description.
*Title HQ Holden
The HQ Holden was made in 1974. The HQ Holden is life sized.
This sculpture is the HQ HOLDEN and Jeff Thomson made it. Jeff Thomson is a famous New Zealander that makes sculptures. I am going to tell you some things about it. It is the most famous sculpture Jeff Thomson has done.
Jeff Thomson’s sculpture is in the Te Papa museum. The sculpture HQ Holden looks like a car made out of corrugated iron. Jeff Thomson uses the HQ Holden to drive around in.
My most favorite thing about the HQ Holden is that I now it can drive and I think that is amazing. I chose the HQ Holden because I really like it and it blows my mind that it can drive places. The HQ Holden says that I am a car and there are some other cars that people can get around places quicker but we can (that means the cars) do it in style. I think Jeff Thomson made it by getting a car and getting some corrugated iron and putting it on top of the car.
This sculpture makes me feel like I am so lucky that I get to have a famous person in New Zealand that makes amazing sculptures. Jeff Thomson’s sculptures are almost all see able because they could be in museums or at a park.
This is the success criteria that I used in this description.
Purpose: to inform
Text type: Description
Success Criteria (based on Kid speak progressions)
- beginning, middle and end (structure)
- topic words (vocabulary)
- different sentence beginnings (sentence formation)
- added detail to my ideas (content and ideas)
- punctuation that helps the reader (punctuation)
- my goal is to put punctuation in my writing
This is the steps that I had to do on this description.
- Put the name of Jeff Thomson’s sculpture as the title*.
- Download and insert photos of the sculpture.
- Put your writing goal in the success criteria.
- First paragraph: Write an introduction that informs the reader of the sculpture you are going to describe.
- New paragraph: details about where it is, what it looks like, what it represents or is used for and any other special features.
- New paragraph: What you like about it? Why did you choose it?. What does it say about our world? How can nature change it? How do you think Jeff Thompson made it?
- Conclusion: A personal comment - how does the sculpture make you feel? Say something to the reader about Jeff Thomson and his sculptures, especially this one.